Thursday night we had small group, with a few members missing. During the course of our study of Jude, the conversation turned to a place where we really realized that we need to take some time and find out what we want from a small group, and what God has brought us all together for.
This is really exciting. I’m incredibly enthused at our group really spending some serious time figuring out what our values are—what are we coming together to accomplish in each others lives. Are we strictly a Bible study? Do we need to become more socially-minded in our focus, not to the exclusion of study, but to actually try to apply it and have the conversations we maybe don’t feel we can ask in our typical group format?
I really don’t know, but it will be interesting to find out.
One of my favorite things to come out of the night was an expressed desire to actually be studying independently, and coming together for discussion (and correction where needed). I think this is the thing that I am anticipating the most, as I have been feeling very convicted of late about how our group runs in this regard. Currently, we have a bit more “formal” teaching, despite my best efforts to move to more of a discussion-based format. While I love formal teaching, I don’t know that the small group setting is the most appropriate place for it.
The thing that excites me most about all of this is that it’s step to finding some direction in one of the many areas of my life where I feel more than a little lost.
I spoke with a mentor and good friend about this the other night; honestly, I’m wrecked emotionally. I’m exhausted, physically.
But I’m getting more out of Scripture than I have in a little while. I’m reading it with a hunger, that while I can’t say it’s ever been missing, has really intensified. Maybe it’s that desire for the law that the psalmists wrote about repeatedly (which I’ve gone on about at length at least once). What he told me was that it’s because God is taking my head knowledge and turning it into experiential knowledge. That God has ordained this time in my life to draw me closer to him.
Just sitting here thinking about this has made me realize something: If that’s the purpose for everything that’s been going on over the last seven weeks, it’s worth it. I want to come out the other side a more mature and godlier man. Only time will tell.