Have you ever noticed how it’s tempting to question God about what He’s doing? I think I’d be lying if I said I never did this, but it’s usually about something ridiculous or “small”—but when it comes to big issues, we tend to not freak out. I can’t recall having a “why, God, why” kind of moment when something big’s gone down. During Emily’s miscarriage and the aftermath three years ago, neither of us spent much time questioning God’s purposes, only asking Him to help us glorify Him. We didn’t as far as I can recall when we sold our home, despite seeing two strong offers fall apart literally at the last moment. And thankfully we didn’t when we found ourselves at the hospital once again last Thursday morning after Emily woke up having contractions.

We rushed our Abigail & Hannah to our friends’ Joe & Emily’s house for an impromptu playdate and zipped back over to the hospital to get Emily admitted. After about four-ish hours of monitoring in the birthing center’s triage section, they moved Emily into a delivery room (just in case) where she’d receive dedicated care. And she received wonderful care all around. The nurses and doctors were very helpful in explaining what they were doing and why, the potential complications of a premature birth (relatively minor at this stage in comparison to those of baby born at 27 weeks or less), and plans for long-term care if necessary. Part of this meant that Emily was permitted to come home on Friday afternoon and given orders to do pretty much nothing… which is quite possibly the worst thing you can do for someone who is very active and relaxes by doing things (crafting, sewing and, strangely, cleaning). Monday (today) we have a follow-up appointment at the hospital that includes an ultrasound to see how things look; if the doctor is not happy with what she sees, it could result in Emily being checked into the hospital for an undetermined period of time.

Through it all, we have and are praying—and asked friends, family and the larger body of Christ to join us in doing so—that the baby would be healthy and be “ready” for his debut, which is something we’ve been praying for all along. (Emily’s quipped that apparently God answered that prayer with a trip to the hospital and two steroid injections.) Today I wanted to thank you if you’d found out about this situation on Facebook or Twitter and joined us in prayer and ask you to please continue to do so. We’re not sure what the results of our follow-up visit with the doctor is going to be (it’s Sunday night as I write this), so by the time Monday afternoon comes around, Emily could be hanging out doing her normal routine at home or be enjoying the finest amenities offered in the Ontario healthcare system.

But there’s something else you can pray for as well. We want the baby to be healthy, yes. We want Emily to be healthy, yes. We’d prefer that Emily be able to stay home and go back to her normal routine, absolutely. But whatever decision is made, we want God to be glorified in our response. If there’s one thing that you could pray for above and beyond the immediate health needs of Emily and our soon to be born baby boy, it would be that.

Thanks any prayers you’ve given on our behalf thus far. I’m eagerly awaiting an opportunity to share more news soon!

And now for the update: Emily gets to stay home! She needs to take it easy, but the doctor was just fine with letting her come home and resume some of her normal routine. We’re currently looking into options to assist with the burden of the housework (some of which I’m doing, but there’s a lot I can’t do simply because I have a job), as well as doing some heavy-duty meal planning and advanced preparation for the coming week(s). The doctor is hoping that aside from regular appointments, we won’t have any visits to the hospital for the next month, at which point they’ll be just fine with seeing our baby boy delivered. So this is very good news and we are praising God for this!

With 2011 officially gone today, I wanted to take one last look back on the year that was. This time I’m focusing more on a few of the experiences I’ve had in this past year and what God’s been teaching me through a number of these events. The short version is that 2011 was without a doubt one of the most peculiar years of my life so far. A lot of amazing events, more than a few frustrations but… as far as I can tell, it’s all been worth it.

Here are some of the highlights (and lowlights):

1. We found out we were expecting our third child. And this time, it’s a boy, which is very exciting. However, we’ve had an unusual amount of interest from family and friends in deciding upon his name. My friend Adam is holding out for “Hurricane” but I don’t think that’s going to happen (although that could make for a pretty awesome nickname if he’s as crazy as his big sister Hannah). We’re still praying about the final decision, but have something in mind.

What’s God teaching? In this case, to be very polite and patient with our family as they offer suggestions for this child’s name, even when we may or may not prefer some of said suggestions because they’re just excited.

2. Pitching a book—and seeing it released in the same year. More experienced folks have informed me that this is extremely unusual (from what I understand, the process is normally between 14-18 months). The pitch went out in mid-April (I was even able to pitch in person a couple times, which was a neat experience), the process of writing began in earnest in May (I’d been doing research for months prior), and… the book was released October 1.

What’s God teaching me? While writing, I was maintaining my full-time job, the blog, selling my home and trying to be a reasonably involved parent and husband. Even the fact that I was able to write it at all seems absurd, given the amount of work I tend to do. If I had to guess, I think God was showing me that when He wants something done, it’s going to get done, when He wants it done. He also reminded me that without a very patient and understanding wife, I’d be in a lot of trouble. This is especially important as I start work on sample chapters for a couple of new possible projects.

3. Burnout and the death of “performance-ism”. I came dangerously close to burning out toward the end of September/beginning of October. My job at times can be very stressful which generally I can handle. However, I also have an unfortunate problem with my personality type—I can easily begin to focus on issues over which I have no control and no ability to influence (the details aren’t important). My inability to deal with my stress was leading me to become increasingly irritable, have trouble sleeping and gain weight at a very fast rate, among other things.

What’s God teaching me? In late October, I travelled Phoenix to live blog the Together for Adoption Conference. The content was terrific, the time hanging out with Kaleb Sharmahorn and Steve & Molly McCoy was awesome… and somewhere between listening to Tullian preach and getting home, my stresses were gone.

*Poof*

I can’t really explain what happened there or what God was doing, but I think what God was teaching me through this was that I’d been holding onto a sense of “performance-ism”. I’m a pretty sharp guy and I’m capable of doing a lot of things (as evidenced by number 2). However, this can also be something of a curse as it’s easy to start putting my sense of worth in my own abilities, rather than the One who has given them to me. I must rely on my performance for my sense of value. Doing so only robs God of His glory and me of my joy.

That, in a nutshell, seems to be much of what God was teaching me through 2011. Hopefully I’ve been paying attention.

What’s one thing that God was teaching you throughout 2011? What are you going to do with it?